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finmeister:

MY MOM JUST GOT OUT HER BIRTH CERTIFICATE AND FOUND OUT SHES BEEN SPELLING HER NAME WRONG FOR 49 YEARS

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trust:

i hate when i find people younger than me attractive it makes me feel uncomfortable 

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fovelshucker:

TODAY MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER BURNED A DOLLAR IN FRONT OF US BUT HE FORGOT TO TELL US THAT THE DOLLAR WOULDNT BURN ONLY THE ALCOHOL WOULD SO HE TOOK OUT A 100 DOLLAR BILL AND SOAKED IT IN ALCOHOL AND WERE LIKE “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” AND HE CAUGHT IT ON FIRE AND WE ALL YELLED AT HIM BUT THEN IT WENT OUT AND THE BILL WAS FINE AND WE WERE SILENT FOR 20 MINUTES

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sidnugget:

like a  month ago this lady came into my health class and talked about internet safety and she said the government has access to all of our snapchats we send and i was really happy because the government owns probably over 500 pictures of my double chin i dont know what else she said because i fell asleep 

(via cumfort)

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